Jean pant

i bought some underpants yesterday, cos my washing machines broken and i've worn all my other pairs about three times already. So i thought i may as well get two pairs you know? Cos i don't really go underwear shopping that often.
So i got them home and was all excited cos it was quite cold yesterday and i wasn't wearing anything under my jeans. And then i put these things on, they're like those tight-ish cotton cross between boxers and normal underpants, and they come up to my arms.. they're supposed to be quite short, but if i pull them up so my special bits are snug, then they come up to just under my chest. They're so long. I look like an old woman.
Now when i let my baggies hang down a bit so my boxers stick out just a bit for that sexy look for Carrie, I look like an incontinent man with a boob tube.
Don't ever buy underwear from Pick n Pay.

Coincidence?

I think not..

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=onree


OnRee is currently penning his own Urban Dictionary entry. One for "Mary Smith", that common descriptive adjective.
Although its still a work in progress, the words "jilted", "ex" and "i thought you rather liked me.." are definitely in the mix.

Facebook

This post is about Facebook, you know that social networking tool(?), and why I decided to quit it after one week.
It raised alot of very interesting questions for me, seeing as I had decided beforehand to only give it a five day evaluation and then decide if it was, as many friends had told me, an excellent and powerful tool for connecting and interacting with friends. Or, as I had told myself, yet another foray into the self-lobotomising toilet that is The Hype.

I like writing, and putting some thought behind what i write, so i've tried to give you a very honest and holistic account of my experience. But who am i kidding huh? the short story probably makes for far better reading: See, i met this girl at a kids party last sunday and felt my heart smiling as I spoke to her. She left a very gentle, creative impression on me and i would have loved to have seen her again. Again turned out to be Facebook, which I promptly joined the next day and skipped along to her profile, whistling and beaming and followed by singing white doves.
Imagine then, the pain and dismay, at seeing her current profile: Status - In A Relationship.

Bugger.

It was clear as day then, why i couldn't like Facebook no matter what. It wasn't because it was fake and nothing like real life. It was because it was exactly like real life. Ooeeerrr missus...


Okay, so thats the short story. If you're late for something then go, the rest is pretty boring.
There are plenty good things about Facebook. Once those lines from American Pie stopped ringing in my head ("Well, I know that you’re in love with him, `cause I saw you dancin’ in the gym.") i decided to treat Facebook more like a social anthropology project. That, and it actually did look quite cool. So many of my friends where already in it. They where cool, but was I?
Within minutes it turned out that I was the twentieth person from my year at high school to join. Alot of Facebook is pure voyeurism, and I must say, once you actually remember who those people where its pathologically satisfying to see who they are now. Like picking at a scab. But not as rewarding. The few people i remembered turned out pretty much exactly how i thought they would. Bygones.

The voyeurism theme is prevalent though, I could now see my friends, and theirs, and theirs, ad nauseum. And people could find me too. Indeed, the best thing to come out of all of this was a "Friend Request" from Lee Darby, my bestest mate from Std 6 & 7. The first time I went to jail or threw a skateboard at my brothers head was with Lee. He lives in New Zealand with his wife now, Big thumb Lee, nice one.
Another nice touch is searching for your own name and seeing what your namesakes look like, what they do. In retrospect I can't actually remember what they do.. There was one in London who had a really fucked up cut n' paste picture though. ha ha that made me smile.

By day two I was addicted. Unlike GMail Facebook doesn't update automatically, so you have to go to it every couple of minutes and press refresh. Once I figured out what my wall was and where it was i could read stuff. Short stuff from friends. This was nice. Ish. No deep musings or electricity bills, just people taking ten seconds out of their day to remind you they where still alive. Facebook isn't the kind of place for anything or anyone too deep. I couldn't imagine a scribble on my wall starting with "Jesus Christ says .." you know?, (except actually i can, it would be something like "Jesus Christ says if you wanna ride, its gas, grass or ass!")

But these short scribblings, at first fun, then time consuming, and finally quite irrelevant, highlight another theme of Facebook - this 'slogan culture' we've developed over the last fifteen/twenty years.
No longer do you have the time, or create the time, to communicate in the lush and descriptive intensity that you are capable of. Because Facebook communication is all about quantity, not quality. It comes down to someone telling me "Just do it" (replace with any facebook comment here), and i think, "Do what?, and why?" Sorry, but 99% of this slogan culture is so bleak, and I like details, I really do. My life isn't made richer by the ones and zero's, its made richer by truly connecting with other human beings, and trust me, its usually the shit about yourself that you think is totally insignificant that's like nectar to someone else.

So I seem to moving to the dark side of Facebook. Lets look at a double edged sword now, the posting of pictures, of yourself and of your friends. The moment someone tags you in a pic, its broadcast to everyone that knows you. They get a link and you hope that, at best, it's flattering, and at worse it won't lead to any arrests for public indecency or vandalism. I'm not too bothered about what i look like anyway, but admit it, there have to be some photo's you've just cringed at? (Right now i'm thinking of a New York cab six years ago, aaiieeee..). The kind of nice thing with this, although i never actually did it, is the ability to post some severely unflattering photo's of your Least-Liked-Friend-Actually-She-Fucked-Up-My-Life-So-Fuck-Her-Friend. And although I could only really think of one person i'd do this to, the idea of perhaps posting a shot of a sweaty Uruk-Hai from Lord of the Rings, and tagging it with her name, was consoling in the most conniving of ways. Like a belly warm from cognac and cigar smoke.

But ultimately, it was Facebooks failure to pass my acid test for anything in my life that gave it the thumbs down.
Did it make me happy?
This isn't an easy question to ask, remember details, details, but i think the final answer to this was no.
I think, given the time, it would become a responsibility instead of a release. The pressure to constantly stay active, and look like you're Hey Wow! Fully! YEAH Man! is fake, and the quickest way to morose is fake. Last night i went to yoga, went home and made fish. I played some guitar and then i went to sleep, content and happily average. If I'd spent that time on Facebook, so occupied with what other people are occupied with, I think my brain would be smaller today.

So, at the end of all of this, I think we can all agree that the short version was alot better.
Told you so.

Epilogue

The Five Greatest Bands Ever - Epilogue


So it only took a year, but the Five Greatest Bands Ever are now truly immortalised on Chez OnRee.

On sifting through the electronic debris of our collapsed civilisation millenia from now, I'm confident that any alien race will take OnRee's word for as absolute fact. So under the "Life form: Human, Category: Pinnacles of Sonic Achievement" entry in the Galactic Encyclopedia, you'll find just five great bands representing the human race. I take a moment to pat myself on the back.


So its taken so long, and to be honest its a bit relaxed at work so I actually have the time, but i'd like to wrap things up. What was very nice to see, was that even though the Greatest Five have been around for quite some time (none younger than twelve years), that all but one of them where still active. Indeed, alot has happened in the last year. Lets have a look.


The Possums have been the quietest. I did find a MySpace page but not very much happening. They do have some videos(!!) for download though. Too cool, thanks for that guys. It was also interesting to see how many posts there where with calls for them to reform. Nearly as many as the ringone and weight-loss ad's masquerading as real posts. Should call it AdSpace.

My favourite surprise, I must admit, is that The Rentals are in the studio, recording their third album for release later this year. I got hold of one of their new tracks "Walking with a Ghost" and its excellent. Its not classic Rentals, alot cleaner & tighter, but if its a taste of what's to come in the full album then I'm totally stoked, missed them so much & glad they're back!

Weezer are also working on a new album, number six for them, I'm excited but not as much as for the Rentals.

NoFX released an ep and a full album last year. All about taking the piss out of Christianity, it was good but lacked some of the new idea's that made their classic albums. Alot closer to home though, after the recent tours of Fat WreckChords artists like the Mad Caddies and Lagwagon, the talk is all about a NoFX tour to our very own South Africa some time! Whoo Hoo! Happy days!

Beloved Sparklehorse released fourth album "Dreamt for Light Years in the Belly of a Mountain" last year too. Quint got it for me for Christmas and I gave it a solid four OnRee St*rs. In reading reviews for it, I did start to get the impression that the past five years have been pretty hard for Mark though. I know i don't know him at all really, but I feel for him, its frustrating not being able to show him how much his creations, which are a part of him, mean to so many people. Wishing you nothing but happiness Mr Linkous.

And lastly the Pixies are, as I mentioned, making all these ominous bellows of a full blown come back, we'll see. Power to them.


So yeah, most of them still have the passion, its good.I was also interested in some statistics, so lets see:


Ha ha. That was quite a nerdy thing to do.
Anyway, i think the one interesting thing there is that they're all American! I didn't even realise that until now now..

Now I gotta give some kudos to some of the bands who nearly nearly made the nutty lunch bars of Greatest Band their own. These are elite ranks to be in so lets dim the lights.
First up is Ash, who sang 'Oh Yeah' to me on my radio every day in '95 while I worked on my final year assignment. And when I heard them play a cover of Weezer's 'Only in Dreams' in Sydney a few years ago, their indie-pop iconic status was pratley'ed and putty'ed forever.
The Strokes, for being,.. well, The Strokes. Future gods who spread their own sound revolution, like Nirvana ten years before them they came to wipe the slate clean.
The Smashing Pumpkins for being the Alternative cornerstone of the nineties. We look forward to their new album(! ja!) on the seventh day of the seventh month of this 2007th year. Nifty innit?
Biohazard for making testosterone, tattoos and loyalty worthy things. DFL!
Eels (who was just edged out by Sparklehorse), for some of the most beautiful arrangements you'll probably ever hear. Go listen to a track like 'Railroad Man' next to a lake far away from anything. You'll leave feeling alot more human.
Faith No More for jumping around in shorts, telling Anthony Kiedis he's a prat and doing 'rap-metal' along with Anthrax about ten years before Limp Bizkit fucked it all up.
And finally the Foo Fighters for taking the mantle of best rock band with humility and confidence. You have to respect any band that consistently releases best-seller albums but won't release a 'Best Of' to cash in over christmas. They played Reading in 2002 and finished their set with 'February Stars' as fireworks went off overhead. It was as touching as you could get in an english mudbowl.

And thats it!
phew, i don't wanna write another thing about music for a long time..
(Except that the Sons of Atlantis are playing at Roxy's on the 29th May 2007, come have a glass of red)
I don't really regard Chez OnRee as a proper blog, so I wasn't too perturbed by David Bullards recent comments about, briefly, how kak 99% of blogs really are. And since David is one of my favourite columnists (the others being Chris Barron, Nadine Botha & Hogarth), it wouldn't perturb me anyway. He makes me laugh, and any blogger stupid enough to compete with him makes me laugh as well. Nuff said.

Orrait bye.
Stay Wise.
Have Fun.

the Pixies

Nod your head sagely, and stroke your beard.
For this is what you've been waiting for all along isn't it?
Adjust your reading glasses and murmur agreements under your breath as we weave this tale together. Together, i say, since even though it will be me narrating, it will be your memories that give mine credence.
We're finishing off the Five Greatest Bands of All Time with a bang, leaving the best to last some would say.

the Pixies.
Back in '93 I went to university. I was seventeen.I met a guy by the name of Olaf Wagner, a rather straight but nonetheless good guy. He wore Cats alot.As these things happen, we traded some TDK copies of our fave bands. I think I gave him some Metallica albums, he gave me the Breeders. The Breeders. I was in love.
Like one of those lizards on the Galapogos islands I had existed solely on the heavy metal scraps my older brother threw from the plate, or the christian videos they showed sometimes at school with shit like Ozzy Ozbourne eating bats & Iron Maiden doing Number of the Beast. But here was an entirely new beast, and it was time to evolve.

Like those hippies in the sixties, I like to think each person has their own personal summer of love. Its when life conspires in an almost Paul Coelho-esque way to bring enough fantastic things together for you to realise that the world is indeed a beautiful place and that its a wonderful life. (A simile for Girls, Music, Ale & Sun really*)
So there I was, Summer of Love '93/94, literally popping out of my baggies and in love with a woman I could never have. Kim Deal's lips smiled back at me whenever I saw her photocopied face sellotaped to my guitar case. I painted Breeders logo's on my canvas case next to peace signs (yes.,i know..), and even had the nickname Kim for a while. (This was okay since Soundgarden had a bloke on guitars called Kim which made it cool and not gay.)
So before you could say Ed Is Dead, I had hit a motherlode of indie-alternative, a house of Tanya Donelly's and Kristin Hersh's. A world filled with Muffs, Cocteau Twins, Primitives and Sisters of Mercy. Smashing Pumpkins in the kitchen and PJ Harvey's on the roof, shouting at the moon. A family, but with one undisputed head.

The Pixies.

There are many accolades you can give a band, but there's one that transcends all.
Its when a band makes you want to be in a band.
When just lying in your room, listening to a copied tape playing through your kak Aiwa tape deck, sounds better than anything you've ever heard before. Actually, you have heard it, its in the desperation and euphoria you've felt since you where sixteen so the notes and pace and lyrics come like deja vous.
Frank howls and it shouldn't sound good. Joey slips riffs like splintered glass in your skin and it shouldn't feel good. David sounds gaunt and angry, his snare snaps like brittle bones and it shouldn't sound good. Kim repeats those same beginners' bass lines and for the life of you this really shouldn't sound good. And it doesn't. Because after hitting all five Pixies albums in a space of six months, your concept of the word 'music' becomes synonymous with this band. They don't sound good, or bad. They're not making music. They are music.

Phew, some heavy words there.
Hope you're nodding your head though.
If your name is Olaf, or Ashton, or Jayson, then you sure are.
So do you want to go through stuff like albums, and songs, and history and stuff? We'll see if there's time later, there's so much (great) reading material on the net for these guys that I think I'd be flossing a dead horse.
A nice tale is this one though: That when Frank Black and Joey Santiago first put out an ad for a bassist wanted, they got only one response. Kim Deal. She arrived at the audition quite enthusiastic despite the fact that she didn't even have a bass guitar. Her sister, Kelly, had one back home so Frank lent her fifty bucks to travel across states to get it. Nice one Frank.
Then, very briefly, they got signed to 4AD records, released 5 albums, toured the world and broke up with the same lineup. All this happened between 1987 and 1992. It still warms me at night that one of my truly favourite acts of all time started playing when I was only twelve..

I left home when I was eighteen and worked in a pizza shop for cash. I could make forty pizza's a night and it remains the most rewarding job i've ever had. I rented a freezing outside room with no hot water near varsity, and wouldn't own a car until four years later. After class (or more likely drinking in the kaf) me and my mates would come back to mine, climb the ladder up to my corrugated iron roof, and park off. Park off with a quart, watching the sun invent new colours on the Aukland Park clouds, and listen to the Pixies. Its their melodies that play in my head when i remember those times.
Its impossible to pick out Pixies' songs, for whatever reason. I would always get so frustrated trying to make a mix tape, trying to decide between Pixies tracks. I've read quite a few articles and sites that try and trace some kind of change in style and sound as their careers progressed, but I think thats a bit of a stretch. You could stick each Pixies song on a name-tag, pin them to a wall and blindfold yourself. Whichever thirteen tracks you hit with your darts would sit perfectly together on an album. I think. Yes, synths crept into later albums but never overpowered or led in any way. Their songs are just neigh impossible to fault.

I also liked the way they came across. Remembering here that my previous role models wore cowboy boots, tights and make-up, identifying with a bunch of working class guys in sneakers was more relief than anything else! It was an honesty they brought to everything, and if you've ever seen a Pixies concert you'll know that Iraqi statues move more than Frank & Co.
I've only seen them on dvd, but i like to think that there's a time and place for performers like the Pixies. Where the spins and leaps and knee skids a-la-Fall-Out-Boy, are replaced by this god-like presence. These four sage's who dole out healing for the soul.

I did manage to see Frank play an accoustic set in london, he was terriffic and did a couple of Pixies tracks, but (sorry for pointing out the obvious), something was missing.
I was then in london a year later, drowning my sorrows with Bruno at the fact that the Breeders tickets had sold out weeks ago. I would be missing Kim playing live. What happened then still makes me smile. We walked back through town, and purely by coincidence walked past the London Astoria where they where playing that night. It turns out I had the most mortified look on my face, since a young girl came up to me and gave me a spare ticket she had for half the price. I thanked this saint and the Breeders absolutely rocked!
I was also in Chicago back in 2001, where through yet another series of strange events I ended up with the Breeders at Steve Albini's studios. I was skating just before so I had a chance to get the adrenaline out of me, which was good since, well.. fuck i was gonna hang out with Kim Deal man!! Kim was humble, funny, charismatic and kind. She bent over backwards to make me feel at home, she made coffee, we played cards and i smoked her cigarettes. I think many people fear that meeting someone they truly admire won't be all that. But this was. I left with the same love i had entered with.
Steve Albini rightly told me my demo cd was shit, but at least offered to introduce me to some latino girls i could marry and get a green card. Cool cat that one.

So where does this leave us?
Rumours of new albums, reunion tours, live dvd's, compilation albums. The Pixies machinary creaks and we all hope it has a Jackie Chan ending, since how many bands do you know to come out of semi-retirement blazing like they used to?
As for me, well I'm okay. I figure it may not hurt to come back after all these years, and in any case they've done enough to get anything they want as far as I'm concerned.
The Pixies are a personal band, if you've read this far then I don't doubt you have a place for them in your past as well. I just hope I've done them my own little justice.

The Pixies. They are, and will always remain, one of the greatest bands ever.

NOFX

I was reading over my previous posts, the greatest bands ever and all, and i started to get worried that it was all getting a bit dramatic. Perhaps a bit too touch feely. And then i thought fuck it. If you cant be touchy feely about one of the most important things in life, then whats the point of it all anyway? Fuck. So with much swearing, substance abuse and old baggy shorts, I give you... NOFX!!

[Okay, sorry, i shouted there... see, thing is, our lads in NOFX have this fundamental hatred for public displays of adoration. They honestly believe in the whole underground keep punk rock elite thing.. So pretend i'm being all cool and underplaying their sheer brilliance, even though i'll be doing the opposite.]

So years and years and years ago, probably about the time you where crying on your first day at nursery school, a couple of guys started an utterly shit punk band called NOFX. They where terrible, absolutely awful, but in their defence they where only sixteen. So lots of kids start bands, and they suck (i did), but why do some bands keep going, and going, and going, until they cant help but sound amazing? Its like I tell Quinton sometimes, when we're watching telly, and there’s some obscure fucking Ukrainian who's managed to squirt orange juice out of his eyes. I tell him, "Dude, if we didn't work, like Olgef over there, and we spent eight hours a day learning that shit, then we'd be able to do it too". And, now get a pen cos this is important, here's the clincher: Olgef believes in what he's doing. Getting on telly didn't matter to him. What matters is squirting orange juice out of his eyes. And that’s why NOFX had no choice, they couldn't stop going, they where always going to be the best punk rock band of their generation, because they honestly live what they preach.

mmm... Perhaps a bit airy fairy for you? Okay, so what about their music?
Shit. This is hard. Its california punk rock with splashes of ska for sure, but now you're thinking Brink 182 and Green Day and thats the last thing i want. No, rather think of the most liberating moment of your life. The time you walked away from a group of 'friends' who weren’t your friends at all, or when you realised you didn't really love your boyfriend anymore and had the guts to say it. Now add a total explosion of bass, surgical strikes of guitar and the tightest drumming this side of Bloc Party, and complete with enough black humour to fill a dead whale, and you've got NOFX.
Make sense?
Good.

Now NOFX have recorded about thirteen albums so far (wtf!?), so i can't go into that. Lets rather pick common themes like swiss chocolate from a girl scout and enjoy them under the NOFX sun.
ahhh, thats nice. So the first chocolate is about being happy, and really, isn't that what lifes about? Every time i put on NOFX its like having beers with friends, they just cheer me up man. Its cool. All that weight on your shoulders melt as you buy their mantras. They just take the piss out of all those fucked up pointless guilts and miseries we knowingly and willingly embrace.
Which is a bit like their next redeeming quality, having the balls to challenge society but having the brains to do it in a way that society will hear. Isn't that clever? Be angry with the world, but tell them a joke and they actually might listen. They also wear shorts. Cool.
Did I mention they write fucking amazing songs too? Their structures always manage to elbow just a bit more room into the punk rock box. They're fast, and they're tight. So so so tight! Tighter than the tightest thing you could ever think of!! aaaaiiieeee!!!!
And they make you think of things you'd never have thought of otherwise.. like the feelings of clams, or quitting your job for punk rock, or girls fisting each other.. Well okay.. perhaps not all of it is totally new... uhhh.. next paragraph next paragraph!

NOFX are already underground punk legends, they refuse to be played on MTv, they won't sign with a major label, but still you can head to your local Look n Listen or whatever, and look under 'N' and they'll be there. When I saw them play in London, they managed to organise an entire stadium for an independent punk festival! No big brands, no computicket kak, it was a total middle finger to the idea that we can't organise any events these days without some form of corporate fucking sponsorship! (And the Mighty Mighty Bosstones also played whoo hoo!) So if anything, let the fact that they're in your local cd shop, without the distribution of some giant record label, mean that they got there cos they're a great band that writes great songs.

If you're interested by this and don't know their stuff, try get a hold of them. My favourite albums where always 'so long and thanks for all the shoes' and 'Punk in Drublic', but i gotta say, their newer 'War on Errorism' was just phenomenal! So if you're keen, then try listen to them, but be warned, if you're easily offended by the glorification of drugs, hardcore lesbian sado-masochism or ridiculing religion, then you just have to listen to them!

NOFX, they are, and will always remain, one of the greatest bands ever.

The Wentals

I'm going to cheat.
I have no other option.
Sorry.
It started like this:
I would drive each morning the same infernal road to work, the world a collage of brake lights and unhappy joburgers. Seeing unhappy joburgers always brightens my day, so i started bobbing my head to the new mp3 compilation pilfered from my brother, and thoughts turned to the number 3 slot of The Greatest Bands Ever. There where two bands i had in mind, intertwined and laced with the love and hate that only siblings can feel, so equally profound and deserving of the award. The enormity of the task weighed heavy on me, and the more i relistened their back albums, the more i realised they had to share the slot. Not because I'm trying to cheat and fit in more bands, its just that they are like two parts of one final philosophy that hasn't yet been written. I hope you agree.

So without further ado, I give you two of the Greatest Bands Ever, Weezer and the Rentals.

Weezer. i don't know where i'd be without them. Honestly. I've been sitting here for half an hour thinking of how to start this, and I can't. So let me just start at the beginning hey?
In the late spring of '94, an aspiring dj and mate of mine called Mike Austin hooked me up with some new music. In the pile was a tape by a band called Weezer, it was their first album and it didn't have a name, it was just called the Blue album because of the cover. Now if i ever met a genie, and got three wishes, the first one would be to see every drop of beer, liquor and spirits I've ever drunk placed in a big warehouse. I'm just so curious about that. The second would be to ask which album I had listened to most in my life. And I'm almost certain that it would be a waste of a wish, cos I know the genie's gonna say "Weezers Blue album dude."
I had that tape in my kak aiwa tapedeck on constant repeat. It was perfect. We used to haul deck chairs up onto my tin roof and crack open a beer, and pretend we where far away from Aukland Park and the skyline was a blue ocean. And if you where listening to Weezer, man, it wasn't hard at all. How can two guys, Rivers Cuomo and Matt Sharp, just get together, and in one year invent an entirely new genre in music?? But they did, now we have something called Emo, and bands like Jimmy Eat World, Saves the Day and Ozma are the living echo's of that seismic union between Rivers and Matt.

Rivers played guitar and sang, Matt played bass. They got a drummer and extra guitarist and within one year where getting played on radio stations from Tokyo to Johannesburg. Most reviewers like to label them geek-rock, but thats such a misnomer. Somewhere between surf, fifties and post punk rock is where you'd best find their irrepressible melodies and totally forgivable sentimentalities. Geeks, they are not.
They followed up the Blue album with Pinkerton, a very different affair, complicated and nowhere near as accessible. The sounds where dirtier and looser, and Pat sounds like he's playing a marching band drum set he found in some old ladies attic. The stories are definitely Weezer though, full of insecurity and innocence (or loss of..), but.. just... weirder. "I'm dumped she's a lesbian", or the song about the young (very young..) girl waiting for Rivers in Japan.. man,.. , it just got a bit.. (eyebrow raising motion..).. hmmmmmm...

Anyway, i still liked it and had it on one side of a tape i played in my beetle for about four months (the other side was Squeal's Long Pig). But the public didn't buy it, the sales flopped and i think Rivers called it a day. Not Matt Sharp though, he had some (i think) brilliant ideas for a different type of sound. So he formed The Rentals and recorded their first album 'Return of the Rentals'. It was so different to Weezer in its use of heavy distorted moog synths, and beautiful female vocal backings, it was alot more pop than rock albeit slower and darker. But it was again so similar to Weezer in its belief in melody and hooks you could sing along to. I think in a way Matt was alot more creative in his vision than Rivers, but his vocals would never reach the same heights as Rivers could. In a way they both sold themselves as the musical underdog, but it was Matt who could wear this badge a bit more honestly.

So where are we? Ok, the next thing that happened was that me and my girlfriend went to Portugal and backpacked to Spain and one fiery summers afternoon found shade in a local music shop. About to pay at the check out for my Manic Street Preachers album, i found myself staring at the 'New Releases' section where at No 1 was the Rentals brand spanking new album 'Seven More Minutes'. I love Spain. So did Matt. He wrote most of the album there and much of it is a homage to the Catalan way of life, one so easy to fall in love with. Even the cover is a blurry Barcelona alleyway.
Now by now our Matt was looking and acting alot cooler (quite like me at the time too I must say). He was hanging with alot of cool british folks, and you can hear people like Justine from Elastica and Damon from Blur on the album. I have absolutely no idea what Damon's on about in 'Big Daddy C' though, god i think he's awful. But the rest of the album is like a severely troubled child, one that you love unconditionally if its yours. I was also happy to see that Rivers wrote the title track for Matt, the world was a better place knowing that Matt and Rivers where still mates.

Now comes a bit of a lull, because Seven More Minutes doesn't sell. It would turn out to be the last Rentals album, a goddam pity i say but so be it. It would be a full two years before I found myself in New York City, at Tower Records, buying the brand new Weezer 'Green' album the day it was released. Its grown and grown on me since that day, listening to it while driving across north america in a big van helped fill me with images of endless prairies and unquestioned answers that bubble up whenever I hear the opening thuds of 'Dont Let Go'. Its a teriffic album, and even simpler and more accessible than the Blue album. My only gripe is the length though. I remember being priviledged enough to spend time with Kim Deal while she was recording a new Breeders album in Chicago, and the moment we spoke about the Green album we both said 'But its sooo short?!...'. I think it clocks in at under half an hour, what Rivers was doing for five years is anyones guess.

Since then Weezer released two more studio albums, of debatable quality, and Matt has released a solo EP and a solo album. The only one I haven't heard is Matt's solo album, but judging from his EP its pretty heavy listening, almost alternative country in a way. He's looking a tad haggard on the cover too.. (sorry Matt). But then the news that truly bothered me:... Matt was suing Weezer for proceeds from the Sweater Song, a single way back on the Blue album. Thats 12 years ago now!?. What was it all about? Was Matt done in by his former band mates? Or was it greed? Jealousy?

I don't want to know.
I'd rather leave you with this undeniable truth:
Somewhere there's a lake trapped in an eternal summer, where a nineteen year old you spends its infinite days swimming and falling in love and wondering why you feel so safe even though you're so far from home. And thats when Matt and Rivers will be there, to tell you why.
Weezer and the Rentals.
They are, and will always remain, two of the greatest bands ever.